How to conduct effective one-on-one meetings with direct reports
Run regular 1:1s that build trust, drive development, solve problems, and strengthen manager-employee relationships.
Your Progress
0 of 6 steps completedStep-by-Step Instructions
1 Step 1: Establish consistent cadence and protect the time as sacred
Step 1: Establish consistent cadence and protect the time as sacred
Schedule 1:1s weekly or biweekly for 30-60 minutes and defend this time fiercely. Never cancel for other meetings—it signals the person isn't a priority. Let them own the calendar invite so they control timing. Block prep time before each meeting. Consistency builds trust and psychological safety; sporadic 1:1s undermine relationship and effectiveness.
The Manager's Path by Camille Fournier
Comprehensive guide to engineering management including effective 1:1s
2 Step 2: Let the employee own the agenda and conversation
Step 2: Let the employee own the agenda and conversation
This is their time, not your status update meeting. Ask them to prepare topics in advance in a shared doc. Start with "What's on your mind?" or "What do you want to talk about?" Address their priorities first. Add your items only after covering theirs. When they drive the agenda, you learn what actually matters to them versus what you assume matters.
Manager Tools One-on-One Guide
Free detailed framework for structuring effective 1:1 meetings
3 Step 3: Create psychological safety for honest, vulnerable conversation
Step 3: Create psychological safety for honest, vulnerable conversation
Ask questions that invite openness: "How are you really doing?", "What's frustrating you?", "Where are you stuck?" Listen without judgment or immediately problem-solving. Share your own challenges and uncertainties to model vulnerability. React calmly to difficult feedback. If people only tell you what you want to hear, the 1:1 is performance theater, not genuine connection.
Radical Candor by Kim Scott
Framework for building trust and having honest conversations
4 Step 4: Balance short-term tactical with long-term developmental topics
Step 4: Balance short-term tactical with long-term developmental topics
Don't only discuss immediate projects and blockers. Reserve time for growth conversations: career aspirations, skill development, work-life balance, team dynamics. Alternate between "what are you working on?" and "where do you want to grow?" Both matter. Purely tactical 1:1s miss the relationship building and development that drives retention and engagement.
Lattice
Performance platform for tracking 1:1s, goals, and development conversations
5 Step 5: Practice active listening and ask probing questions
Step 5: Practice active listening and ask probing questions
Listen to understand, not to respond. Pause before answering. Ask follow-up questions: "Tell me more about that", "What else?", "How did that make you feel?" Summarize what you heard to confirm understanding. Avoid interrupting or immediately offering solutions. Often people need to think out loud more than they need your answer. Your presence and attention is the value.
The Coaching Habit by Michael Bungay Stanier
Seven essential questions for coaching-based 1:1 conversations
6 Step 6: Document key discussions and follow through on commitments
Step 6: Document key discussions and follow through on commitments
Keep a shared doc of discussion topics, decisions, and action items. Review it at start of each 1:1 to close loops from previous conversations. If you commit to something—getting them a resource, making an introduction, addressing a concern—follow through. Nothing destroys trust faster than repeated commitments without action. Track patterns and themes over time to spot trends.
